When Life Gives You Lemons...

I recommend using rum over vodka.Il Limoncello dell’Æolia
1 L of Good Rum or Vodka Dry
5 Lemons
5 tablespoons of sugar cane
5 tablespoons granulated sugar

In a large bowl, whisk the sugar with 1/2 the liquor chosen until well incorporated. 

Zest lemons using a microplane and set aside.   

Squeeze the lemons and add the juice to the liquor and the dissolved sugar, add the lemon zest and the remainder of the liquor and let marinate at least 2 hours. 

Filter through a fine mesh sieve and put in the freezer to cool and serve cold.

Sausage and Black Bean Soup

I started making this hearty soup in the wintertime when we lived in Italy.  I love the simplicity of it while still having a fulfilling meal. You can use canned black beans and smoked sausage, such as andouille or Polish kielbasa.

I like to take one can of the beans and blend it with part of the stock to make the soup thicker.  Also, my husband is not a lover of beans so pureeing some and only keeping some whole make it smoother.  Of course you can make it a “brothier” soup by not blending the beans or even thicker by pureeing all of the beans – it is all about personal preference.

Prep: 10 mins
Cook: 35 mins
Serves: 4-6

2 teaspoons extra-virgin olive oil
1 pound kielbasa or other smoked sausage such as andouille, cut into 1-inch pieces
4 medium carrots, small dice
2 shallots, small dice
2 leaks, sliced
2 garlic cloves, minced
2 cans (15.5 ounces each) organic black beans, rinsed and drained
2 cups chicken broth
Salt and ground pepper, to taste

In a large cast iron or soup pot, heat oil over medium-high. Add sausage and cook until browned on all sides, about 10 minutes. Transfer to a plate to drain.

Add carrots, shallots and leaks to pan and cook until beginning to soften, about 5 minutes.  Add garlic and cook about 1 minute. Add 1 can of black beans and broth and bring mixture to a boil.

In a blender add the remaining can of beans and ladle in about ½ cup of soup mixture.  Puree until smooth.

Add the pureed beans back to soup and then add sausage, reduce heat to simmer, and cook until carrots are tender, about 13-15 minutes.  Season with salt and pepper.

Muffins

Yes this is a mom blog; however, this is not a post about any of our precious little crotch muffins. It is a banana muffin recipe post goddammit. 

Banana muffins are a staple in this house.  It is the easiest way to use bananas when they become over-ripe - and an easy breakfast or snack.  I have been making these for a while now and when I do they certainly do not last long.

Added bonus is these are gluten-free!

Some mix-ins you can add - Chocolate chips, chopped nuts, peanut butter chips, etc.

I prefer to warm up the muffin and top with a schmear of natural peanut butter. 

Banana Muffins

Prep: 10 mins
Bake: 16-18 mins
Yield: 12 muffins

3 or 4 Large bananas, mashed
1/2 cup cane sugar
1 slightly beaten egg
1/3 cup melted butter
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 ½ cups almond flour
½ cup oat flour or brown rice flour
¼ cup flaxmeal

Preheat oven to 350 degrees and prepare muffin tins with liners or grease.  

Mix the mashed banana, sugar, egg and butter together. Set aside. 

In a separate bowl, mix together baking soda, baking powder, salt, flours, and flaxmeal. 

Mix dry ingredients into wet ingredients. Pour into prepared muffin tins.  

Bake for 16-18 minutes or until a toothpick comes out clean.

*These are much more flavorful the next day, and they freeze very nicely too!

Bah Humbug, Sort Of, or What I Want for Christmas

'Tis the season for shopping, wrapping, and one-upping. Everyone is trying to out-do one another. We get it, you secretly think you're a professional decorator and better than that mom you're kinda/sorta friends with. But, like, why do everyone's decorations look they are out of a magazine this year? Don't people have work and kids and pets and stuff? Well, here's mine, as of this moment. I think they are amazing.

Speaking of keeping up with the Joneses, almost time for ridiculous Elf on a Shelf posts. God, I hate that thing. If I was a kid, I would be so creeped out by an inanimate object that came to life at night. When I was younger, if dolls came to life, they killed you and everyone in your family (see: Chucky from the "Child's Play" movies). And, lest you think my hatred is a recent development, check this status update from last year. I'm nothing if not consistent.

Despite what you might think, I really do love Christmas. I'm not even railing against the commercialism or consumerism, per se. It's just become yet another excuse for people to compete with their 'friends' about stupid shit by pretending their life is perfect on social media. Look, we all know it isn't, okay? That's part of the reason Amy and I started this blog. We know the kids aren't snuggled in bed (they won't go to fucking sleep), the stockings aren't hung by the chimney with care (because thing two tried to flush one), and momma is not in her kerchief settled in for a long's winter nap (BECAUSE THE KIDS WON'T GO TO FUCKING SLEEP, OMG). And we know this because we know you, and because humans are infallible, and because kids are selfish jerks sometimes. It's our job to raise them to not be selfish jerks (which some people REALLY suck at, but that's a blog post for a different day...).

So, all this to say, what I really want for Christmas this year is for people to stop photoshopping their lives. Be more real and authentic about who you are, and how you live your life. And yes, if you like Elf on a Shelf, knock yourself out (watch out he doesn't). But my point is don't do it because you need to be better than Sally Smith with HER kids and post every god damn picture of it on Facebook, ya know?

PS - In regards to photoshopping my life, I am still going to airbrush my zits out of pictures, though. Adult acne sucks, so bite me.